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Many of our temples are bedecked with acrobatic
friezes of copulating couples. There is no dearth
of erotic fables that depict tales of a Hindu God
of Love flirting outrageously with milkmaids
bathing in a river. The ancient treatise of Kama
Sutra offers useful tips for the entire palette of sexual delight.
The entire gamut of Indian ancient history is studded with
unabashed sex. But what about a modern Indian couple who
dare to fall in love? Smooching pairs in clubs!
Lovers holding hands on the beach!
Despite our liberal past, modern Indian
culture has evolved along such conservative
lines that any contact between members
of the opposite sex is frowned upon and it can even lead to
instances of Honor Killing. The term, “Honor Killing” is an
oxymoron, but it has come to symbolize the social opposition
to sexual freedom. Coercion, assault and murders of young
boys and girls by their own family members have become so
common that the liberals in the country have no alternative
except to hang their head in shame.
How can there be any honor in killing anyone? But that is how
society chooses to define such acts. If a boy or a girl dares to
fall in love, members of their own family, motivated by a brutal
sense of honor, use violence against them. In many instances
instead of punishing the perpetrators of such violence, society
seems to support them. Statistics are notoriously hard to come
by because of the private nature of such crimes, but the few
cases that get reported make it clear just how dangerous falling
in love can be. |
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| The Killing Fields |
 Purro Kaur, a woman from a village
in Haryana had her nose chopped off as
punishment for her son’s love affair. Her son Tarsem Singh
was in love with Heera Singh’s niece. But the girl’s family
members were against the relationship and she was forced to
marry someone else. However, the two reportedly continued
to see each other and that angered the girl’s family. In a fit of
rage Heera Singh barged into Purro Kaur’s house and chopped
off her nose. Needless to say, the subhuman ape called Heera Singh didn’t have the courage to deal
with Tarsem Singh; cutting off the nose
of an old woman was more in line with his
level of physical courage. Or his thinking
could be even more diabolical. He might
be holding Tarsem Singh responsible
for ruining a woman of his family, so he
wanted to avenge his honor by ruining a
woman of Tarsem’s family.
In Punjab, twenty-two-year old Geeta
Rani, a Rajput woman, married Jasvir,
the son of the only Jat family in the
village. Her parents did not object to the
match. But the Rajputs in Jasvir’s village,
including a suspended police officer,
decided to “teach him a lesson” for
marrying one of “their” women. Within
two months of the marriage, he was the
victim of a brutal murder, with his hands
and legs cut off. One hand was thrown
into Jasvir’s aunt’s house. Now Geeta
lives the life of a widow and runs from
pillar to post in hope of getting justice. In
Jhajjar, a Jat woman from Talav village
married a Dalit. She was forced to return
to her father’s home, and there both she
and her sister were murdered. So were
a Dalit woman and a man who were
accused of helping the girl to elope.
In 2003 at least 13 incidents of honor
killing got reported form Muzaffarnagar
district of western Uttar Pradesh.
In 2002, while 10 such killings were
reported, 35 couples were declared
missing. Caste panchayats have come
to play an increasingly important role
in this area and elsewhere, especially in
situations where political patronage also
exists. Central to the theme of honor
and violence is the subordinate position
of girls and women in all castes and
communities. People are motivated by
the obsolete idea that a woman’s chastity
is the “honor” of the community and that
she has no right over her own body at any
point of her life.
Such prehensile mindset can
manifest itself in the most educated and
westernized sections of the society. The
high profile murder of Nitish Katara by
Vikas Yadav, the son of a controversial
don turned politician, was an act of honor
killing. Vikas could not accept Nitish’s
relationship with his sister and that
is why he killed him. Even though the
woman involved in this case was highly educated and belonged to an upwardly
mobile class, her brother could not grant
her the right to choose her male partner.
After a long trail lasting for more than
6 years a city court finally reached the
verdict that held Vikas Yadav guilty of
Nitish’s murder and sentenced him to
life imprisonment.
 On May 10, 2008 a young girl and her
boyfriend were brutally murdered, in a
Haryana village, for running away with
each other. In this case, almost the entire village seemed to side with the
murderers. The villagers said in front of
TV cameras that what the family did was
right because young ones who dare to
fall in love deserve to die. The poor girl’s
mother coldly admitted on camera that
the girl got what she deserved and that
the family had the support of the entire
village. The family felt no remorse at
all. The boy’s father said, “We did
it because he deserved
it.” In this case not two but three lives were
lost, because the girl was six
months pregnant when she
was killed. |
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| A Global Problem |
 The concept of honor killing
has its roots in the 1752
B.C ‘Code of Hammurabi’
and dates as far back as
the Assyrian legal code of
3000 B.C., wherein men who
committed rape were punished
themselves (indirectly) with
the rape of their own wives.
There is no dearth of modern
day tribal leaders who tell their
followers, “A woman is like an
olive tree. When its branch
catches woodworm, it has to
be chopped off so that society
stays clean and pure.” People
inspired by such sermons are
capable of murdering their
women and their paramours
for flimsiest reasons. There
have been many occasions
when perpetrators of honor
crimes in Islamic nations
have been venerated by their
society instead of getting
punished.
According to a report
prepared by Shirkat Gah,
the eminent human rights
activist, there is almost one
instance of honor killing in
Pakistan every day. The same report goes on to say that out
of 5,000 honor killings worldwide, in the year 2000, around
1,000 took place in Pakistan. It is not as if the honor killings are
confined only to tribal areas, the towns and cities are turning
out to be as unsafe for women. In 1999 the murder of 29-yearold
Samia Sarwar drew considerable media attention. She was
shot dead by a family acquaintance because she had sought
divorce from an abusive husband. Although the link between
the killer and Samia’s father was established, no action was
taken against him.
Even Western Nations are not untouched by such violence.
In 2005 Europe was shocked when six Muslim women living in
Berlin were brutally murdered by their family members. Two
of them were stabbed to death in front of their young children,
one was shot, one strangled and a fifth drowned. Their crime?
They were trying to live like any normal German woman. When
their killers were nabbed, they failed to show any remorse for
the crime they had committed. Even within their communities,
the killers were revered as heroes for preserving their family dignity. How can such a horrific
and shockingly archaic practice be
flourishing in the heart of Europe? |
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| There is no dearth of
modern day tribal leaders
who tell their followers, “A
woman is like an olive tree.
When its branch catches
woodworm, it has to be
chopped off so that society
stays clean and pure.” |
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| Heart of Darkness |
Despite all the progress that
mankind has made during the
last few decades, majority of the
societies around the world continue
to be patriarchal.
Men see women as their property
to be disposed of as they wish. Even
women see themselves as property
of the male members of the family.
That is why we continue to have
murders in the name of honor
killing. It is a proverbial “heart of
darkness” that fills people with such
madness that they start putting
some misguided sense of honor
ahead of the life of an innocent
human being who has always been
part of their family. It’s a strange
kind of honor that tends to attach
itself to rigid codes, usually caste or
religious codes. But this is also an
honor that can only originate out of
a deep-seated feeling of inferiority
complex and jealousy.
In a country like India that is
blessed with so many religions,
castes, communities and subcastes,
intermarriage is not only a
constitutional right of every adult
citizen, but also the inevitable way
to celebrate the bonds amongst us.
After all, what is the point of sending
boys and girls to schools and colleges and allowing them to
vote - in short, in pretending that they are adults - if they are
not allowed to fall in love and get married to the person of their
choice. The problem seems to be in the way men define their
honor and take away their women’s life instead. People who
indulge in such crimes are nothing more than petty dictators,
who want every female in their family to be at their beck and
call.
In 2006 the Supreme Court had delivered a landmark
judgment where it termed “honor killing” as an act of barbarism,
and ordered the police across the country to take stern action
against those resorting to violence against men and women
who go for inter-caste or inter-religious marriages. That is the
only way to solve the problem. No leniency should be shown
to organizations and individuals who indulge in honor killings.
Most exemplary punishment should be given to them, so that
others can draw lessons from their fate. At the same time
society must work towards recognizing and strengthening the
rights of young couples for own-choice marriages. |
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(By Anoop Verma)
